A Lagos funeral depends on the faith and the age of the person who died. A young person’s death is mourned quietly. An old person’s long life is celebrated, sometimes as lavishly as a wedding.
Muslim funerals
Muslim burial is quick, usually within a day, after the body is washed and prayed over. Prayers and gatherings follow on later days. If you hear of a Muslim friend’s bereavement, go to the family’s house to condole; you may well have missed the burial.
Christian funerals
Christian funerals are usually held some weeks after the death, while the family prepares, and often run over several days: a wake or service of songs, the funeral service and burial, and a thanksgiving service at the family’s church afterwards.
Celebrating a long life
For an elderly person, the funeral is also a party: a reception after the burial with food, music, aso ebi and many guests. It is a celebration that the person lived long and well.
As a guest
- Wear what the family asks; often aso ebi, or black or white. If unsure, dress soberly.
- Bring an envelope with a cash gift for the family, which helps with costs.
- Condole with the family directly, in person if you can.
For the family
Registering the death, the medical certificate, the mortuary and the estate come first, whatever the customs.
Funerals in Lagos can be very expensive, and families sometimes feel pressure to spend more than they can. A funeral that honours someone does not have to empty the estate.